Stop being too polite: five counterintuitive tips to improve prospecting calls
What really makes a sales call successful? To find out, a group of brilliant MIT students applied AI to 40,000 outbound prospecting calls made by memoryBlue SDRs. Assistant Professor Bitty Balducci from Washington State University uncovered patterns that go far beyond script and product pitch.
Her research zeroed in on vocal nuance, language patterns and tone shifts—and the results were clear: how you speak matters just as much as what you say. Bitty identified five key traits that consistently showed up in successful calls: future-focused language, confident delivery, controlled positivity, adaptive pacing, and active listening.
This article breaks down one especially surprising takeaway from the research: being overly polite on calls can actually hurt your outcomes. While this guidance is based on U.S. sales conversations and may not apply globally, the lessons are immediately useful for SDRs looking to improve results now. Cultural expectations in markets like Japan, Korea, Germany, or France may differ and sales teams should always adapt to local norms.
1. Cut to the chase
Prospects are busy. Opening calls with long-winded, overly polite introductions or asking if you’ve caught them at a bad time inadvertently invites them to end the call prematurely. Instead, clearly state the purpose of your call early, directly communicating value.
Example:
- Polite (ineffective): “Good afternoon, sir. I’m terribly sorry to bother you, but do you perhaps have a moment to talk?”
- Direct (effective): “Hi John, I’m calling to quickly discuss how our solution can streamline your sales process.”
2. Lead with confidence
Being excessively polite can suggest that you’re unsure about your offering. Assertiveness, not apology, inspires confidence. Adopt language that confidently conveys the benefits and purpose of the call.
Example:
- Polite: “If it’s not too much trouble, could we possibly schedule a meeting?”
- Direct: “I’d like to schedule a brief meeting to show how we can help improve your outcomes. What works better for you—Thursday this week or Monday next week?”
Pro tip: Offering two clear options makes it easier for people to say yes and avoids decision fatigue. Open-ended scheduling questions often lead to indecision or ghosting.
3. Embrace future focus
Prospects respond positively to future-oriented conversations. Rather than focusing on whether they’re busy now or what their past experiences might have been, clearly articulate future benefits and actionable next steps.
Example:
- Ineffective: “Have you had problems with your sales software in the past?”
- Effective: “Imagine cutting your lead response time in half next quarter. Let’s explore how we can make that happen.”
4. Match the prospect’s style
Too much politeness creates distance. Instead, match your prospect’s level of formality and tone to build rapport quickly. If your prospect is casual and friendly, reflect that. If they’re brief and formal, mirror that efficiency.
Example:
- Prospect: “Hey, what’s up?”
- SDR Response: “Hey, quick call to chat about enhancing your team’s productivity next month.”
5. Limit negative language
Keep your speech positively oriented. Negative language or excessive apologies can subconsciously communicate inadequacy. Frame conversations positively to maintain authority and engagement.
Example:
- Negative: “Sorry if this sounds inconvenient, but could you meet tomorrow?”
- Positive: “Let’s arrange a brief meeting tomorrow to get you started quickly.”
The bottom line
I am excited about the work Bitty and her team did, and want to continue sharing practical insights for sales professionals looking to enhance their effectiveness. Check out the podcast we did together.
Politeness matters, but successful prospecting calls prioritize clarity, confidence, and directness. Stop worrying about being overly polite, and start being effectively direct. Your prospects—and your quota—will thank you. Thoughts?
